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Had my midyear review (no I haven't been there 6 months & I can't explain why I had it at 4 1/2 months), & was told to be more aggressive and not so shy. I'm sure it will shock none of you to discover that the person reviewing me has never actually worked with me directly. In other news, kid #1 is now nearly my height & must find a job to pay for his incredible consumption of food & shoes. Kid #2 has recently discovered Dr. Seuss & now demands 3 books a day. He is for sale since he's too young to work & this cute kid shit comes with a side of sarcasm. The hubby lives & works, though he's mostly just sleeping this week since he has the flu. All in all things are proceeding apace & I haven't set my school on fire despite many many moments this quarter where it seemed like the thing to do. How goes life in your worlds?
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Got to DC yesterday. Had grand plans to see all the things. New gig has me busy as Hell, so fun time will be limited until Thursday. Have not lost desire to see people, but I spent 8 hours today trying to absorb my body weight in information. May need more brains.
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New gig will have me in DC from Dec 18th-23rd for training. I'll be busy during the day, but I should have some free time in the evenings if any of you are local. This job is a super serious grown up job y'all. I may need to take a few dozen deep breaths to deal with the imposter syndrome. Just so you know.
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I got a new better paying job *dances* and it is in a different agency so there's no more asshole coworkers. Only downside is I'll have to consistently dress like a grown up & I'm going to be the new employee who is also a supervisor which might be awkward. Any tips, tricks, or links to new cool clothes are most welcome.
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So, the husbeast got mugged tonight. He's fine, but they stole his iPod. Oddly they didn't go after his wallet or anything like that. Just his iPod. He's had it since 2009 (yes, [personal profile] tanyad the one he bought from you), right now he's more mad than anything else so he's killing creatures on the video game & we're once again discussing the purchase of a car. I suspect that we're also going to have yet another "I don't want you walking around at night alone" fight soon too.
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I'm a bad blogger. In my defense I've been doing battle with school for kid #2 (who is after being partially re-assessed going to wind up in a regular ed classroom possibly with some support), & trying to write & do all the things. Applying to grad school is also taking up some time. Oh, and I've taken to posting things to Tumblr that I should probably share here just for the heck of it. Feel free to answer the question below if you're up for some discussion.

So I’ve seen whiteness equated with normalcy, beauty, patriotism, sacrifice, purity, intelligence etc. Pretty much all the positives you can load into one concept. So, here in this global post racial society why are we still attaching whiteness to positive qualities? I know there’s a ridiculously high chance posting this will end with someone getting on my nerves, but let’s try it anyway. Name some positives that you associate with POC. Try to avoid anything that fetishizes, erases personhood, or relies on the concept of whiteness as validation. Try to avoid any of the tropes like Magical Negro, Spicy Latina, Smart Asian, Wise NDN, etc. After you remove the stereotypes are there any positives we associate culturally with being a POC?
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So, a year go we had kid #2 evaluated on the advice of his preschool teacher who was concerned about his social skills. The assessment process was a hot mess. They lost him, switched teams mid stream, fed him enough sugar in one meal to make my teeth hurt, & tried to hug him as a diagnostic tool. They decided he was autistic and in need of services, or not in need of services at all depending upon which page of his IEP you're reading. We don't want this year to set him back socially so we went to the local public school to enroll him. Now, we all know he's not autistic. He doesn't meet the DSM criteria for it & never did. Everyone else with any training that has worked with him longer than the 12 minutes his actual assessment took agrees. He's too old for preschool (which he loved), but socially he isn't ready for a room full of boisterous 5 year old kids.

Thus far we've been told everything he doesn't have (he's not cognitively delayed, he's not autistic, he's not PDD-NOS, etc), and all that anyone is willing to hang their hat on is intense shyness & a possible expressive speech delay since he doesn't engage in casual conversation. He has some mild sensory issues (doesn't like loud noises or itchy fabrics), but neither of those are considered serious enough for occupational therapy. His fine & gross motor skills are completely on track & since he can verbally express needs/wants/random observations the speech therapist isn't sure about him qualifying for her services. Hubby & I are having the IEP redone, but they're already hinting that it will come out as not a disability that impedes his education & thus he'll get no support services. We'd pay for private services if we knew what he needed, but thus far that's not been established. We've discussed private school, but the only school we've found that works with kids who have no cognitive delays, but do have social challenges doesn't have a kindergarten. I don't want this year to be too hard on him, but I also don't want to impede the social skills we did see him developing in preschool. We can't figure out the right move & I'm contemplating tears. Thoughts? Suggestions? A guidebook to parenting?
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Have been doing approximately fifty eleven things to make life progress & thus I am fail at blogging & commenting. How goes it?
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So I read this post about the increasing number of death threats against women bloggers. And for a second the old panic started to rise up in the back of my mind, but then I looked around & remembered that I was in the hood in a house full of overprotective black men with a pit bull who thinks I'm hers and I was able to calm myself down some & really look at the last few months. I glossed over a lot of stuff (or didn't post it at all in part), because I knew writing it down would make it too real for me to kind of ignore as I tried to do on a day to day basis. I pride myself on being a tough chick, & I was pretty good at that until I got the descriptions of our clothes and activities & the threats to rape me to death in front of my family.



Curiously, the longer it went on the less mention was made of abortion & the more the threats were about me being female. Some mention of race was made in a couple (mostly of the uppity nigger or black bitch variety), but overall it was about me being female and not knowing my place. Apparently that place is under some man's heel & since my husband wasn't doing what he should do then my stalker would. Which...tell me again about how this whole thing is for the good of women and I might hurt you. This last month I've been getting my legs back under me. Sleeping again (incredibly important as it turns out), spending time with the fam, & just letting myself be while the rawest bits healed. I'm probably never going to be the same, but that's okay. I'm alive & safe & so is my family.

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Yesterday was the migraine that refused all drugs & wouldn't let me sleep either. Today was supposed to be a day to do all the things, but it appears to have been shifted to "recover from yesterday" so I'll try to write between naps & hopefully get to spend tomorrow doing all the things. How goes it?
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Those of you who follow me on Twitter or Tumblr already know that I may have broken some guy's hand today. It was in self defense (he was trying to grab my boob, I was trying to block only my block wound up more like an elbow strike), and I came home in a fit of...something. Is there a word for scared, angry, & sad? Because there should be if there isn't. And then my family made me feel better & now I'm sitting and looking at grad school programs. I need someone to tell me that figuring out a way to get school mostly funded should not lead to me getting two advanced degrees & some certifications. Hurry up, before I start applying to stuff and get myself a MUPP & a MA in History.
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So, finally got over my fear of going to grad school only to land in a fear of picking the wrong major. Why can't I reconcile my brain with itself? I want a degree in well everything, but specifically I want to be taken seriously when I write about stuff like food desserts or the impact of street harassment on women. I also want to spend my days talking fiction & possibly teaching history. Or I could be a lawyer. I have the grades & scores for any of the above so I need LJ to tell me what I want to be when I grow up. Or club my brain into silence. Either one works.
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Some changes are coming to how I use DW/LJ. Nothing is going away & most of the stuff I locked will eventually be unlocked. But I have a bunch of story snippets & creative nonfiction floating around that should be locked if I'm going to sell the larger works they are attached to (I'm making myself get over my imposter syndrome and start submitting things that are completed), and some posts that give away too much info about day to day life that should be better filtered. I could have gone through post by post, but I have a lot of posts, a fairly crappy internet connection, and a whole bunch of other stuff to do right now. If I locked something you especially wanted to see/found interesting/important feel free to leave me a comment and I'll make revisiting that post's security a higher priority. Otherwise I have a Tumblr, a twitter, a G+, and a wordpress blog so I'm not exactly disappearing off the intertubes and my pattern of sporadically updating LJ will continue.
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